MASK OR MENACE IC INBOX

[runningstart]

WALLY WEST
"You've reached the personal voice mail of the Wall-man. The honor is yours! Leave your deets, I'll holla back atcha."
[ BEEP. ]

KID FLASH
"This is the contact for Kid Flash. If it's an emergency, call Robin; he'll know where I am. Otherwise, leave your info and I'll get you back ASAP."
[ BEEP. ]


[ voice | text | email | action ]

( Please specify in tag subject line if the contact is for Wally West or Kid Flash! )

Comments

[tardily]

Yeah, but we also haven't even met. Starting off our first meeting with, I know you don't know me, or if you do it's because you stalk with the best of them— but you're part of that League that I'm also a part of in multiple universes. So you should know I've got my mortal enemy rooming with me and he might be a psychopath at some point and kill people. Maybe. I don't know he's a little unpredictable. I don't want to be known as that 25 year old superhero who introduced himself like that.

Definitely tell Booster since— I don't think I could tell him without laughing at that name. And if you tell Power Girl, ask her how she is for me— I haven't talked to her since I first came here but she seemed nice.

[runningstart]

You big freaking baby. I'll tell Batman. He's not that scary. [says the kid who hasn't spoken to the guy in months because he's scared of him]

1.2

[tardily]

I'm not a baby. I mean compared to I think everyone who is a part of the League in your universe and Superman's universe, I may technically be the youngest but I'm not a baby. I just want to look cool, okay.

This is my version of the wanting to prove I can do this thing. Don't you dare tell Batman, Wally I'm not even kidding.

[tardily]

And he calls himself Batman while his protege is called Robin. I'm sorry but Batman doesn't inspire visions of rainbows and sunshine and happiness.

It makes you think of caves and screeching. And vampires if you're feeling particularly in tune with pop culture.

[IMG] 1/2

[runningstart]

[runningstart]

Look Bats back home is scary okay, but the one here is terrifying because he's not scary. I'm still trying to figure out if he's tapped all my phones yet. I don't even know. [this may not be helpful in showing batman isn't scary]

Point is if you have no experience with a Batman then he's totally not scary. He'll probably ask you out for drinks or something.

[tardily]

[ HE'S NOT A BABY!!!! ]

Was that supposed to make me feel better? Because I had enough phone tapping/camera spying from Eobard at home. [ That is negative degrees of helpful, Wally. Negative degrees. ]

...Ask me out for drinks or something. In what? His civilian outfit or his bat costume? Because seeing a dude in a bat costume and me in my Flash uniform won't look weird at all. That's not even getting into the me not getting drunk portion of this.

[runningstart]

Oh my god! You are such a whiner!

I'm telling him. I'm gonna text him right now.

1.2

[tardily]

I move faster than you, Wally. I'm doing it, oh my god just let me handle this one! You go do Power Girl and Booster, I've got this one.

[tardily]

Seriously, if I find out you did it, I'm not talking to you for I'm not entirely sure how long. But there will be no talking and you'll make Bart feel bad because we're not talking.

So. Don't text Batman. And remember that this is all new to me okay! I'm working on a learning curve that's like running up a very tall building. I'm used to Green Arrow and my team. That's it. Not Batmans and Supermans and everyone else!

[runningstart]

Don't use Bart to blackmail me! And get used to it faster! God, is it a rule or something that once you hit your twenties you have to take as long as possible to do anything at all?!

And for your information I already told Power Girl and Booster Gold, because I am proactive and get stuff done immediately.

[tardily]

I will use our favorite person to blackmail you! I am not above using that card when it works. And it's not a rule, I'm just— I have literally not had proper breathing room since I got out of a coma less than a year ago with superspeed. I had a mentor, lost a mentor, lost a friend, accidentally created the Rogues for myself. Watched my mom die because time travel is great like that and learned that in another universe I have a nephew who is giving me such shit that I want to end this conversation and that I have a grandson. But not only that I have a whole league of people I fight with. And I've only met a grand total of one of them in my world.

This is stuff that is normal to you, Wally. You have several years under your belt that I don't. And it's not like I thought, huh, I think my mortal enemy is going to be ported in only to have me pass out for three days where he has to take care of me. And before I even get a chance to tell anyone that he's here, I turn into some douchebag who beats people up.

So for one second could you just not be you and not essentially tell me that I really messed up. Because aware of it! Super aware of it!

And I texted him, okay. So get off my back about not being proactive.

i lied

[tardily]

And thank you for getting in touch with them.

[ And you know what? He's just going to hang up because he's done with this right now.

So.

Very.

Done with this. ]

text - the following day

[runningstart]

[because while wally is not aware enough not to screech IMMEDIATELY after that, he took it to robin to talk smack about barry and robin told him to pull his head out of his ass and give barry time to cool off

so wally does that and it gives HIM a chance to cool off...some]

i cant believe you hung up on me

thats the rudest thing any barry has ever done

text - several hours later

[tardily]

i'm sorry you didn't deserve that and it was childish of me.

you weren't exactly being nice either, though. i just do not have patience about being lectured when it comes to this. because he's from my world and i know something he doesn't and i'm not going to to tell anyone. because if it gets back to him, he will go completely 100 percent off the rails and i'm not unleashing that.

so i'm sorry i hung up on you. i'm sorry i wasn't PROACTIVE enough, but eobard thawne just does that to me.

text

[runningstart]

i was joking
now i cant believe you apologized for it

text

[runningstart]

i never fought the guy but i know my uncle is scared of him

text

[runningstart]

so if he rattles you half as much as the thawne back home rattles my uncle then hes bad

so i guess i just want to reiterate that im on your side

even if im yelling about it

text

[tardily]

it felt like i needed to. and text doesn't show joking.

i'm not taking it back.

text

[tardily]

i'm not scared of him? not any more i guess. i used to be but that's before i had a name to place with the evil. but he rattles me a lot, because this is a guy i thought was a friend. someone who could help me with my speed and who helped me and my friends bring in metahumans and protect people. and he did those things, just also hated me from the future and wanted to murder me. and threatens people i care about when things don't go his way.

i know you are, wally. and i appreciate it. even if you're yelling and i'm yelling back.

i just don't want anything bad to happen and there needs to be a plan or this will spiral out beyond anyone's control. and i think we can agree, that's a bad thing.

text

[runningstart]

[THAT'S what it is, that's what makes Wally so uncomfortable talking to this Barry. It's the sincerity. His uncle gets like that too, but having known Wally for years his uncle has long since learned how to deal with Wally's flippancy.]

scared of what he could or can or might do then

we can dig a really deep hole and put him in there and occasionally drop food down into it honestly thats the most humane thing i can come up with

text

[tardily]

to other people, yeah. he can do whatever he wants to me.

does he get an umbrella for if it rains or is too sunny? let me make sure i can't think of anything that's slightly less noticeable before we jump to that. can you do that for me? i know, proactive and we don't need to just sit on our butts. but just trust me on this one. just this once, please.

text - this notif got lost I'm sorry!!

[runningstart]

r u asking if i can dig a hole for u because maybe i have one prepared

Re: text

[runningstart]

but fine

hes your villain ill leave him up to you

text shhh it happens to all of us

[tardily]

maybe. you mean you do and i should be a little disappointed but i'm actually a little impressed. that is some definite proactive action going on.

you're kid flash, wally. i do like your input. especially since you're one of the other good flashes.

and if i decide the hole's the best place, you're the one who already had the hole prepared, and i actually appreciate it.

[ Sad fact of the day: He honestly does appreciate it, even if it's also a little horrifying. ]